3 belangrijke levenslessen die ik heb geleerd van een arme Thaise monnik

En een inzicht in de Thaise cultuur.

Een inzicht in een andere cultuur, verteld door een arme Thaise lokale, die graag zijn hele dag wilde opgeven om zijn verhalen te delen met een willekeurige Australische reiziger die niets te bieden had.

Ik heb deze slechte jongen een paar weken in de maling genomen en ik heb eindelijk de tijd om een ​​verhaal te delen waarvan ik denk dat iedereen het moet horen.

Thaise mensen zijn de meest oprechte mensen die ik heb ontmoet. Ze glimlachen altijd, zijn meer dan bereid om een ​​gesprek te hebben en geven graag toeristen tips over het gebied.

Dus het is echt geen verrassing dat ik mijn nieuwe Thaise vriend heb ontmoet, maar toen was ik volledig overrompeld.

Toen ik in Bangkok was, deed ik alle typische toeristische dingen. Grand Palace, Patpong Road (oordeel me niet!) En elke avondmarkt die ik zou kunnen vinden. Toen ik Khoa San Road bezocht (ook bekend als 'Backpackers Paradise'), botste ik per ongeluk tegen een man die op hetzelfde moment als ik de weg overstak.

We draaiden ons om en keken elkaar aan. Het eerste woord dat uit zijn mond kwam, was 'wauw'. Ik wist dat ik er goed uitzag, maar ik vond dat ik er niet zo goed uitzag en helaas zag ik er niet zo goed uit. Hij was verbluft door mijn lengte omdat de volgende woorden waren 'je bent echt lang!'. Voor iedereen die mij persoonlijk kent, zou je weten dat ik tekortkom voor mijn leeftijd. Ik heb geen enkele moeite om de minimale hoogte voor achtbanen vrij te maken, maar tussen de mensen met wie ik omga, ben ik zeker de kortste.

Vanaf daar konden we praten en hij pakte mijn accent als zijnde Australisch omdat hij er altijd van had gedroomd om Australië te bezoeken. Hij was dolgelukkig toen ik hem foto's liet zien van het gebied waar ik woon.

Hoe dan ook, zo hebben we elkaar ontmoet en nu wil ik elk inzicht en elke les bespreken die ik van mijn nieuwe vriend heb weggenomen.

The Act Of Giving

Dit is er een waar hij niet direct over sprak maar ik heb het opgepikt binnen 10 minuten nadat ik hem had ontmoet.

Laten we voorbijgaan aan het feit dat hij letterlijk zijn hele dag opgaf om tijd te besteden aan het onderwijzen van de Thaise cultuur en me te concentreren op wat hij in Bangkok aan het doen was.

Als je mijn recente bericht leest, How A Poor Teacher Leerde mij het belang van geven , wist je dat mijn nieuwe vriend een leraar was uit een kleine gemeenschap, ongeveer 25 km van Chiang Mai. Dat is een 8 uur durende busrit van Bangkok.

Once we got to talking and he had mentioned how he was from Chiang Mai which, at the time, I knew was very far from Bangkok, the story that followed was the most inspiring story I’ve ever heard.

After being a monk, where he was taught about karma, he decided to teach for an incredibly poor school in an incredibly poor town. To give you a sense of how poor, the students live in tin houses with leaking roofs and often miss meals, as even rice is too expensive. Most don’t even own shoes and have to walk miles just to get to school.

My friend was no different.

He earn’t 16 000 Baht a month, which is about $650.00 AUD. This would cover a weeks rent in Sydney but not much else.

So why was he in Bangkok?

To buy his entire class school uniforms!

Which included; a shirt, pants, socks, shoes and a school scarf, and all up cost him 20 000 Baht.

Over a months salary of which he was more than happy to spend.

Apart from being really heart wrenching, there’s a really important message in this story.

Here’s a man who has so little, is willing to give so much and expects nothing in return.

That’s true kindness.

The Joy Of Teaching

After we had talked for about 10 minutes on the side of the road, he made an offer I couldn’t refuse.

He had already finished buying his students clothes and had the day free, so he offered to take me to a close by temple.

The photo I showed him of my hometown.

It was an offer I couldn’t refuse, especially learning about his past as a monk.

I won’t focus too much on what we did throughout the day as it’s not real important to the post but I will provide a quick overview.

We went to the temple and walked around while he told me what everything meant and explained the murals on the walls. After, we went into one of the temples and he taught me how to say thanks to Buddha and showed me the right way to meditate.

After meditating for about an hour, he then showed me how to bring myself good luck by spinning a stone ball inside a stone dragon’s mouth 3 times.

After we finished at the temple, he asked me for a favour.

He wanted to find out how travel agencies quote tourists and what the difference in price is compared to locals. So I had to put my acting hat on and pretend I wanted to go on a huge journey through Thailand.

Turns out, tourists are quoted about 20% less than locals.

Up next was where I got so much insight and learnt a lifetime worth of lessons. He wanted to take me to a ‘locals only’ area to eat authentic Thai food. I say ‘local’s only’ not because it was run by gangs but because the saying around there goes ‘If you see a westerner here, they’re lost’ and I could see why.

The locals only area of Bangkok where I was taken for lunch.

We followed a canal through an incredibly poor area. We sat at a table that if I positioned my self wrong on the seat, it would break.

He wanted to show me how Thai people eat.

Which meant that over the next 6 hours, food would slowly come out and beer would come out fast.

All the different food we were eating wasn’t coming from the same place. In fact, all the little run down restaurants worked together. So, one lady would bring one dish, another would bring more and beers were brought from a little old lady who was sassy as hell.

While we were there he took the time to teach me 30 or so Thai phrases and words that I would commonly use and asked if I could teach him some ‘Australian words’. If you’re Australian, you know what I showed him (for those who aren’t, it was as many swear words as I could think of).

After about the 3rd 750ml beer, my friend started to loosen up and he started to tell me things that blew my mind.

The following topics are why I’m not willing to share my friends face. Could be me completely overreacting but just to be safe and because he never said I could share his face, I’ll keep it hidden. But here’s him on his 5th beer.

The Rich

The rich in Thailand are privileged to a level that you wouldn’t believe.

First of all, I’ll establish what is considered ‘rich’.

Generally speaking, someone who earns over 1 000 000 Baht is considered well off. So about $42,000 AUD. Bump that up to $80,000 — $100,000 AUD (2 400 000 Baht) and you’re considered rich.

Remember this is coming from a guy who earns 16 000 Baht a month. Or, in AUD, $8,000 a year. Let that sink in…

So why am I telling you this?

Bloody excellent question!

In Thailand, the rich can do whatever they want. I don’t mean like speed and get away with it. I mean murder someone and get away with it. Quite easily as well…

According to my new friend, if you happen to kill someone, whether by accident or on purpose, you can pay around 500 000 Baht and never spend a single day in prison. If you’re wondering, that’s about $21,000 AUD.

To add to the fire, this is an actual fear that poor Thai people have. They genuinely fear being in bars/pubs where rich people are because they might cross one the wrong way.

This was a particular eye opener because it explained a couple of things I had seen while on my trip but I’ll get to them when I come to corruption.

The King

The King is treated like a god.

There’s pictures of him everywhere. Most restaurants, bars, streets, hotels, and everywhere in between will have some form of picture dedicated to the King somewhere.

This was no shock and I expected it before I left for my trip but it’s what people think of the current King and what they thought of the old one, that surprised me.

It’s illegal to speak badly of Buddha in Thailand but it isn’t to speak badly of the King. In saying this, it’s still pretty risky. I figured that out when my friend started to whisper and look around before he spoke.

He told me that people loved the old king. He was a peoples leader. He helped aid devastation, provided food to small communities which he would personally deliver. Helped with bush fires, structure building and made sure he was always present among the community. I’d kind of got this vibe before as a lot of the photos you see are of him helping others.

But it’s different with his son, the current King.

He’s a playboy and according to my friend, he’s abusing his power.

He has multiple girlfriends, parties and doesn’t have the care for the Thai people like his father did.

The Elderly

If I had worked my whole life and was retired in Thailand, I’d be pretty happy (as long as I chose the right occupation).

People aren’t really expected to live very long in Thailand and for that reason, it really pays to be over the age of 60.

If you work for the right company or the right industry, when you retire at age 60, you can be paid 600 000 Baht ($25,000 AUD) per month. Then when you turn 70, it goes up to 700 000 Baht and so on.

Isn’t that insane?

Let me also point out that’s not coming from the government. In most cases, It’s coming from the company they worked for.

Unfortunately, it didn’t apply to my friend but he would continue to be paid 16 000 Baht per month until he died.

The Corrupt

The reason why the rich can get away with anything is because of the corruption.

I knew that the police would be a little corrupt but I saw just how corrupt they really were when they tried to extort the manager of one of the hostels I stayed at, for 20 000 Baht per month, every month, to be left alone.

Also, after being told the stories about the rich getting away with anything it was only enhanced.

This is largely due to the low salaries that the police get paid and a mixture of bad pay, a place of power and no repercussions is obviously going to lead to something shady.

No wonder some of the police have beautiful houses in Bangkok.

Marriage

Not so relevant but still really interesting is the way they approach marriage.

The way it works is if two people want to get married, the two families get together, sit at each end of a long table (I added that to make it sound dramatic, I’m sure they also sit at little tables) and negotiate how much the male’s family will pay the female’s family.

My friend had been with his ex-girlfriend for 3 years and wanted to marry her. So they underwent the process.

The females family said it would cost 800 000 Baht and my friends family said they could afford 600 000 Baht (his family were farmers). In the end, they couldn’t agree on a price and the wedding never happened.

This is where I was shocked. I’ve never heard of this happening in Australia and if it did and a price couldn’t be agreed, couples would head to Las Vegas to be married by Elvis.

The Lessons

Here are the main points I took away from the day.

We have it so good — stop complaining

This was the biggest lesson I took away from the day.

We live in a world where we can do literally anything if we put our minds to it. There’s really nothing stopping us but as soon as people need to put in a little work, it all gets too hard.

Goals get too hard.

Life gets too hard and we give up.

But let me tell you this, we have it so good!

We just take it for granted.

Give a little more

One that I don’t practise often enough.

You could argue that writing content is trying to give back but while it makes me feel good, it’s just not the same. I’m also not speaking about donating a lot of money to charity either.

I’m talking about the little things that you would normally miss.

For example, offering to show someone around a new city and teach them about the local culture while expecting nothing in return.

Or offering to mow your next door neighbours lawn since you’re already doing your own.

The point is, I learnt a valuable lesson in what giving back can give to you. In particular, overall happiness and the opportunity to know you’ve done something good.

Don’t play for money

The most obvious lesson I learnt from the experience was don’t play for money. Or at least, don’t use money as your only motivation.

I actually learnt this before going to Thailand when I crashed. Which was partly due to the fact that chasing only money lacks depth and is actually a really shitty motivator.

I realised you need a proper ‘why’.

When I first started out I was chasing one goal, which was:

$1,000,000 by 03/12/2020

This was awesome for a while, until I started to lose focus.

While that goal is still very much alive, I added ‘ to be the number one motivational writer for people with chronic illnesses’.

This provided my goals with some depth and my experience with my new friend only re-enforced the need to have a non-monetary goal.

The experience I had with my friend and the insight he provided me, without a doubt, made my entire trip worth it. Not only because of his stories and what he showed me but because of the little lessons he unknowingly taught me throughout the day.

If you’ve had a similar experience, please leave a comment. I’d love to hear about it!

Please note that the information shared in this post was the opinions of one Thai person. It doesn’t speak for everyone and a lot of people will have different views on the topics discussed. Feel free to leave comments with your own thoughts.